Madame Web | Full Movie | Movies Anywhere

The screenplay is a series of exponentially escalating incomprehensible storytelling decisions resulting in a bona-fide NONSENSE FUGUE.

There’s something almost cosmically funny about the fact that every ill-conceived boardroom mandate and desperate spider-milking mistake backfires in the most spectacular way imaginable.

But where the dialogue needed wit and spark, it has the kind of will-this-do one-liners ("Hope the spiders were worth it, Mom!") and tired backstories you get when the characters are too flat to flesh out with rounded personalities.

Nothing works at all.

Madame Web lumbers from setpiece to setpiece, with a perpetually irritated Johnson acting as she'd rather be anywhere but here.